Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Shorts

It’s finally summer here in the Northwest, and this time it looks like it’s going to stick, too, so we can pretty much count on lovely weather for the next month and a half (except for those three days next week when the family goes camping), and so, in addition to the breathless commentary we get from television weathercasters anytime the mercury rises above 80 degrees, we’re also at last ready to enjoy the lovely fashions sported by denizens of our fair city as they emerge from their polar fleece cocoons into which they’ve been zipped for the last ten months.

Of special note are the breezy sundresses and sleeveless tops worn by young women on their way to office jobs in the morning; as I pedal home from yoga around 8:30 in the AM, I usually have the pleasure of admiring (but not in some creepy old creeper way; rather, in a pure aesthetic appreciation mode) an earnest 20-something on the way to her important position in the city planning department or a graphic arts firm, looking all cool and collected in her flowing skirt and fitted blouse; I’m reminded of the character Jade in “Do the Right Thing,” who alone remained cool on the sweltering summer day in Spike Lee’s classic.

But then, there’s all these young men running around in—and here I go into full Andy Rooney mode—shorts. Shorts? On grown-up males? In public?

Dudes, I’m sure you all have beautiful legs and no doubt it’s slightly (physically) cooler to let your kneecaps run free, but please, have some self-respect. The only time any man over the age of 18 should wear shorts in public is if he’s competing in an athletic event, or maybe, at the beach, if he isn’t planning to dine out in public without changing.

Short pants are for little boys, but maybe that’s the point. Leave me out of it, though; I draw the line at clam-diggers.

1 Comments:

Blogger Andre said...

I lamented not having any clean shorts last night after a weekend away and before heading back out to dinner. I remembered your post and thought I'd try pants, even in the heat of summer. My Chrome knickers were clean but it seems like I prefer to leave nothing to the imagination or all of it.

2:33 PM  

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