Snooze Alarm
One of the longest-running and seemingly least tractable disputes in our otherwise halcyon state of wedded bliss revolves around the use, misuse, and/or non-use of the alarm clock’s snooze button.
Jen believes that the repeatable five-minute delayed wake-up chime is a soothing and effective tool in making the difficult transition from sleep to wakefulness; I am of the opinion that the damned thing is a pernicious and hateful device lying on the scale of evil in the general vicinity of the Saturday night special handgun and Hasbro’s “My Little Pony” doll for girls.
It’s like this:
If I have to get up at 6:00 o’ clock, I set the alarm for 5:59, let it ring once, and then throw myself immediately from the covers before I realize how painful it is to leave bed. Jen, on the other hand, faced with a 6:00 am wake-up call, will make her clock start going off at 5:30, intermittently nudging her awake at five minute intervals, each one another step from dreamland to the real-world.
Jen sees my method as cruel and unusual, a disrespectful slap in the face of the venerable realm of sleep and dreams.
Hers to me is Chinese water torture; a steady stream of painful awakenings, half a dozen times in half an hour.
Such is the shape of many of the deep controversies in the contemporary world—abortion, affirmative action, gay marriage—where reasonable people (check that, scratch gay marriage) can disagree.
This morning, I tried setting aside my usual flopping and sighing to experience it as Jen does. I used the snooze period to enjoy few extra winks and to reflect on the piece I would write on this, a slow news day for me.
Perhaps, therefore, that’s what parties in these other longstanding “holy wars” can try; putting oneself in the mindset of the other may not end the controversy, but it may be a new sort of wakeup call for all involved.
Jen believes that the repeatable five-minute delayed wake-up chime is a soothing and effective tool in making the difficult transition from sleep to wakefulness; I am of the opinion that the damned thing is a pernicious and hateful device lying on the scale of evil in the general vicinity of the Saturday night special handgun and Hasbro’s “My Little Pony” doll for girls.
It’s like this:
If I have to get up at 6:00 o’ clock, I set the alarm for 5:59, let it ring once, and then throw myself immediately from the covers before I realize how painful it is to leave bed. Jen, on the other hand, faced with a 6:00 am wake-up call, will make her clock start going off at 5:30, intermittently nudging her awake at five minute intervals, each one another step from dreamland to the real-world.
Jen sees my method as cruel and unusual, a disrespectful slap in the face of the venerable realm of sleep and dreams.
Hers to me is Chinese water torture; a steady stream of painful awakenings, half a dozen times in half an hour.
Such is the shape of many of the deep controversies in the contemporary world—abortion, affirmative action, gay marriage—where reasonable people (check that, scratch gay marriage) can disagree.
This morning, I tried setting aside my usual flopping and sighing to experience it as Jen does. I used the snooze period to enjoy few extra winks and to reflect on the piece I would write on this, a slow news day for me.
Perhaps, therefore, that’s what parties in these other longstanding “holy wars” can try; putting oneself in the mindset of the other may not end the controversy, but it may be a new sort of wakeup call for all involved.
posted by Professor Dave at 1:58 PM
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